Month: June 2023

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Airports Clogged — What About AMTRAK?


Of late the news is all about the delays and cancellations at our nation’s airports. With our climate change coming into full view these days, it is likely that the air travel chaos will continue. What is the answer? AMTRAK is the logical substitute however, outside of the Northeast and the West Coast, AMTRAK is seriously lacking.

The AMTRAK schedule between certain cities is remarkably sparse. For example, from New York to Chicago there are 2 trains a day. Boston to Chicago, 1 train and our Nation’s Capitol, 1 train. Each of these trains take approximately 24 hours travel time between the two cities. Each of these cities needs to have available trains doubled. And with a combination of track repair and scheduling adjustments for low passenger loadings, the schedules’ time can be reduced. But even leaving them as they are, they provide a mode of travel, while considerably slower than air travel, give a reliable option of travel.

There are other potential high speed corridors, cities that not presently have corridor style service, that need to be considered: Las Vegas to Los Angles, Tuscon to Phoenix to Los Angeles, Chicago to St. Louis, and other cities.

This would require and substantial influx of cash but it has become obvious that such funding is necessary. It will require infrastructure work as-well-as new equipment. But the return on investment is obvious, the reduction of people using the nation’s airlines.

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Tipping


Here in North Carolina, wait staff at restaurants get only $2 per hour, unless the owner feels more generous, which, as a waitress related to me, goes entirely to taxes. So what is a tip?

Where personnel of a restaurant are concerned, there are two different types. There are the cooks / chefs, then there are the wait staff. Cooks / chefs get a living wage. Wait staff rely upon tips for their entire income.

When considering a tip, do not consider the quality of the food. The wait staff has absolutely nothing to do with that. For example, I took myself out to have a steak on Sunday at the local Outback. The steak left a lot to be desired. I told the waitress of my dissatisfaction with the quality of the steak. She took that too her manager, which is where it belongs. However, I gave the waitress a full 20% tip, my usual. She had done a very good job and that is why we tip.

Earlier that same day, I went out for breakfast at a local restaurant. The food was good, the waitress was good. But I got to talking to the waitress and I happened to mention how I saw a group of four people leave only a $5 tip. Now this is not an inexpensive breakfast place. The average meal will cost $20 or more. That meant the table I saw spent about $80, probably more. That meant the tip was less than 4% of the bill. My waitress related that it had been a bad tip day with some people leaving nothing. I find that to be inexcusable.

Another thing to consider is how busy the restaurant is. Did you have to wait to get a seat? Then you must take into account a harried wait staff. Meals come more slowly at such times. That they come more slowly had little to do with the wait staff.

So what should you tip? A 10% tip is low average, 15%, average, and 20% above average. I almost always give the 20% tip because I can afford it. But many years ago I was told by the head waitress at a family restaurant their take on tips. If a person leaves nothing, the think the person simply forgot but if a person leaves some pocket change, that is a signal that the waitress/waiter had done a poor job. Personally, I find it rare that a person does a poor job. To my waitress that morning, I gave her a tip which exceeded the price of my breakfast by a good amount. I stared her in the eyes, said nothing, and finally she took the money after protesting that it was too much. I told her that I was simply doing the right thing.

When you go out for a meal, always consider the tip into the total cost of the meal and prepare for that. I recommend that everyone give the wait staff a 20% tip unless they truly have done less than expected. But remember at the same time, this is what they live on.

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Self-Care: What is it and Why Aren’t You Doing It?


Self-care is a very simple concept. As it says, it is all about taking care of yourself. But most Americans, and probably others around the world, are not do much.

To be in good health is that you are doing three things: a mind not cluttered, a body in good health, and a spirit that thrives.

You would think the first thing would be the easiest, but it is not. Many people do not get an annual physical. Young people are especially guilty of this. They think they will live forever and since they feel good then everything must be good. Not true. First, you must look at your family history and see if there is any medical or psychological history of disorder. For example: my father had heart disease which killed him at a young age, 57. At age 49 I nearly had a heart attack too. But did I even consider it before that? No! In fact, after I left the army, I was guilty of not having physicals. I was most fortunate on the day of my “almost” heart attack, I was very close to Massachusetts General Hospital. That ended in surgery, a cardiac catheterizing when a stent was place in the problem area. Since that incident, I have had a physical every year and seen a cardiologist regularly. Two years ago, I needed a second surgery and last year a third. My heart is strong and heathy.

You say you are 20-somthing and what could be wrong? Cancer, heart disease, kidney issues, lung issues, and other problems which show up in simple blood tests. All doctors who are in primary care always want your history and that of your family. It helps them when they consider possible issues.

If there is a history of mental illness in your family, make sure that you are in strong psychological health. Simply put, if you have periods of depression, that is not normal. If you have fears you find impossible to overcome, that is not normal. These too are things to discuss with your primary care physician. Oh, you must get a primary care physician.

Do you find your mind racing? Do you feel weighted down by problems? This is something which needs attention. Sometimes talk it out with a friend will do the trick. But many times, it is time to call in a professional of some kind. It could be a financial professional, a lawyer, or even a psychologist. There are times when we have lived with some feeling that is uncomfortable, we come to believe it is normal. It is not. If you are known to say or thing that you have no friends, it is time to get help.

Finally, there is the spiritual portion of your life. Spiritually is not owned by churches or synagogues, it is a state of being when you are comfortable with yourself, know how to deal with your own problems, know how to reconcile with people in your past where harsh words were exchanged. This calls for a personal inventory. It is simple in concept but difficult in execution. You have to go through your whole life, look at your shortcomings, look where you have wronged somebody, and focus entirely upon what you have done to people or institutions, and not what they have done to you be it real or imagined.

You can be neither too young nor too old to start doing these things. It all comes down to desiring a better life. If you think your life is as good as it is going to be, do the things about and you will probably find that your life could be better.

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Dealing With Death and Depression


I write this today because a longtime friend of mine died yesterday. I had known him since 1964. My heart is heavy today, but I can find solace in the fact that I knew a kind and gentle person for so many years.

Death is a part of life. It is the earth moving around the sun. It is always in motion and there is nothing we can do to change that. It was here and moving before life even formed on earth and will continue long after all life is extinguished.

My father died when I was just 20. He had heart disease, and his 3rd heart attack ended his life. I cried, I got mad, and I got depressed. In those days I had no idea of how to handle death, or depression for that matter.

The is a single word that we all need to use in dealing with death: “acceptance.” I have heard so many people say that death is not fair, but I always say that, except when death is caused by another human, it is always fair. It is that sort of acceptance that keeps depression away. My friend’s death has given me a heavy heart and with that I can feel the strings of depression tugging but I respond by not allowing such a thing. It is pretty easy actually. A heavy heart is normal and acceptable. When we allow ourselves to have that and to grieve our loss, we can avoid depression. But the grieving process must have a shelf life. If it goes on too long, it becomes self-pity which is always an unacceptable position.

Death will come to each of us and we should all prepare regardless of our age. No one knows the mind of God and therefore, we know nothing of our future or that of anyone else. I am 74 years old and each time I talk to one of my daughters the words, “I love you” are always a part of the conversation because were I to die, even today, they will know of my complete love for them, and for my grandchildren for that matter.

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What is Your Story?


I think I wrote about this a while ago, but it is time for me to revive it in light of my most recent posts.

Every life has meaning. Many of us think we live this dull and boring existence. I can tell you, as a historian, there is no such thing. When I was writing my masters degree thesis, I would have killed to have writings from the mill workers of Lawrence Massachusetts in 1911 to 1912. But I found only a very few in existence. For example, we do not know the name of the woman who started the walk-out at the beginning of the 1912 Lawrence Textile Strike. Such a dialogue, had it existed, would be invaluable. Then there are the approximately 30,000 strikers. If I remember correctly, I only found about 6 stories, some from the U.S. House Representatives hearing on the strike, and about 2 verbal memories. My own grandmother was a part of the strike, but we have no record of either which mill she worked in nor of the strike’s effect upon her and her young children.

I always like to recount my story of taking a cross-country trip on AMTRAK from Boston to San Francisco. Somewhere in Ohio an elderly woman got on the train, and I was fortunate enough to be seated across from her in the dining car. I ask what she had done for work, and she responded that it was nothing special. But up a little more prodding from me, she related that she had been a teacher in a one-room schoolhouse in southern Ohio. We talked well past the time the last of the diners had left the car. Her story was absolutely fascinating.

The point of these occurrences is that each person is a part of a much larger story. But unfortunately, precious few ever write down their experiences in life as they go along. They forget that things they experience during their lifetime have a shelf-life time that expires. For example, when I was young, all gasoline was pumped by an attendant. It is rare that you find that today. Hence, another part of our history is passing and soon the gas stations themselves will be a rare thing as electric cars take over.

You might say, “well, I’m just a ________ ” and fill in the blank. The thing with that is that your experience is unique because you are unique. There may be 10,000 people doing the same job, but each person’s experience is always different. For example, you may run across a well-known person in doing your job. Historians love to find such experiences as they give a first-hand account of what that person was like at that particular moment. You might also say that you lived in “tornado alley” and had had many experiences with that phenomenon. I have never had such an experience so find out what it is like from the common person is important.

Historians love nothing better than first-hand accounts of just about anything. Today’s scholars write about historical events through the eyes of others. Why cannot that person be you? In doing a writing on the first day of the American Revolution, I came upon a diary of a young boy. His short account of what he said brought a valuable insight. But he referred to that occasion as the beginning of “hostilities” as the idea of a revolution had yet to exist in anyone’s mind.

The best way to keep an account of your life is by journaling. With today’s computer systems, that should be a very easy thing to do. By recounting what you see and hear, you are giving insight to your life at that particular moment in history. The personal accounts of people who lived through Hurricane Katrina, the California wild fires, the Mississippi floods, the 9/11 accounts, the bombing in Oklahoma and so very more, one day, will be extremely valuable for a future writer of history to have that first-hand account.

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It is Time We All Slowed Down


The late 20th and early 21st century, it seems that everyone has become more and more in a rush to get something or go somewhere. The most obvious place where we see such things is on our roads and highways. People seem to have taken to the left lane on our highways instead of staying to the right. What is their rush? How much time do they expect to make up in their rush to get somewhere?

My experience is that I see many drivers going 10 mph or more over the speed limit. On a long drive you can certainly go further in a day but what are you risking? When roads are constructed the engineers response set a maximum safe speed for that road. In my travels I have driven on a highway where the speed limit is 80 mph. But mostly, I drive roads that are 70 mph. The problem arises when that highway passes through a city and the speed limit drops to 50 or 55. Too many drivers ignore the speed limit. They put aside their responsibility to drive safely for the other driver.

But this is just a small part of our need to slow down. I have asked people, friends, to lie down on their bed, get very comfortable, close their eyes and then take in a long slow deep breath through their nose and then slowly let it out through their lips. I ask them to do this 10 times. Afterward, I ask them what their experience doing this was. Without exception they tell me they feel much more calm. What they are doing is destressing from the demands of the day. It is a very real way to slow down our minds. Then I ask them to take inventory of their body and what each part is feeling. I explain that each part of our bodies will tell us something different if only we were to listen to it. I always use the example of asking what they feel in the neck and shoulders. Invariably they respond that they feel tightness which is just another place our stress settles in. But in doing a complete inventory of our body, with our eyes closed, we find that our legs, our stomachs, our backs and other places feel tight and therein lies the problem.

The way we got to that place is very simple. We are not taking care of our bodies and our bodies are sending out all the signals it can that we need to destress. That means we can start by simply slowing down.

Many people will say, “I have to do this” or “It has to be done quickly.” They question they fail to ask themselves is that of the truth to their statements. Do this with three simple questions: Do I have to do this? Do I have to do this now? Does this have to be done by me?

People commonly stress themselves by thinking they must clean their house all in one day. And when they fail, they end up feeling badly. The better approach is to pick one or two rooms to clean in one day. By doing this every room will be cleaned and there will be little, if any, stress involved.

Have you ever gotten angry because some driver around you does something you consider stupid? We all have but it is our reaction to this that makes the difference. If you decide you need to yell at them, as if they would hear you. My response is to simply call them a dumbass and then return to my job of being a responsible driver. This keeps my mind slowed down.

I recommend that on a daily basis everyone take at least 10 minutes to meditate. Don’t think you know how? It is simple, go to your backyard or a quiet place, and focus on something which pleases you. Do not let your mind wander from that unless it is to another place you find pleasing. My best thinking comes during these times of meditation. Things I have decided are a problem are solved by my slowed down mind. The solutions just seem to pop into my mind as if from nowhere. But in truth, I have simply given my mind a break from being stressed and a chance to come up with logical solutions.

One last good thing to do to quiet ourselves and slow down is to take a daily walk, ideally with our spouse, a friend, a lover and walk for about half an hour. You are forcing your body to slow down because walking peacefully allows our body to slow down.

These are but a few examples of gaining more pleasure from our daily lives through slowing down. There are many others but you have to start somewhere.

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Why Are We Angry?


Anger can be a useful tool in our lives. But for the past 6 years, it seems the level of anger in this country has risen to an unacceptable level. You need only look at a few politicians to find the source of much of this anger at it root. But what has happened in turn is that Americans are simply getting angrier at other things as well.

Have you ever gotten angry at another driver on the road? Of course, you have. But why? Ironically, when I am driving and my wife is with me, she is the one who get angry at inconsiderate drivers and not me. I find this hilarious, but it is also a problem. Why is it I do not get angry at these drivers? It is simple, I have accepted the fact that there are a lot of fools driving on our roads. What can I do about it? Where the other driver is concerned, nothing. Where I am concerned, take it in stride and accept it. By doing this, I do not get stressed.

The golden rule says: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” I take that very seriously. And so, I do a lot of little things that I hope will in turn make the other person at least smile. One thing I do is, when I am at a checkout counter at a store, I always say to the checkout person, “have a wonderful day.” Sometimes they do not acknowledge but that is all right. And other times I see them smile and respond in kind. Another thing I do is, I have this stack of $2 bills. I will always give a waitress one of them as a part of her tip. Since the $2 bill is not seen very much, many of them are amused and therefor a little bit happier.

But the question remains, how much anger is needed in our lives. In a perfect life the answer is none. That means that if we think through the problem which has caused our anger, we need only think of a solution, or, barring that, we need ask ourselves why are we getting angry? The kind of anger I most frequently get is towards our elected officials who do not seem to have the needs of their constituency at the forefront. That anger lasts for less than a minute once I realize there is little I can do about it except vote, and/or, write that person a letter explaining that discontent.

It is said that humans are social creatures. If you accept that, and that is what science tells us is the truth, then we must act as if we are always at a friend’s party and keep smiling and saying happy thoughts. If we are being drawn into a contentious conversation, we can simple excuse ourselves from it and find a happier place.

The bottom line is, trying justify anger is like trying to keep the tide from coming in.